Sunday, March 18, 2012

Cafe Flora




Today I had a fantastic dinner at Cafe Flora with a couple of my fellow funeral divas, and had such an amazing meal, I just had to post about it. It was like dying and finding out Jesus was actually real, a vegetarian, and loved booze......which is how I'd picture him.

Thank you Jeebus, for Cafe Flora.

We had some drinkie-poos to get started. Holly had the tea in a fancy-pants little pot with a 3-minute hour glass timer. Heidi and I decided we both needed booze and caffeine, so we each got a coffee, and she had herself a glass of wine.



I didn't want to appear as a drunken fool, so I decided on a drink I knew I wouldn't care much for, a mojito. Now, you know what a mojito is supposed to look like, right? little bit of booze, sugar, and a mash-up of mint that gets caught in your throat, right? Well, they brought out this:

What the hell is this glorious freak of nature?

I was assured that this was indeed their version of a mojito. Hunks of huckleberries, plenty of booze, and I'm pretty sure they finish it off with a small helping of crack. I ordered 2. So much for my plan.

For our main courses, I wanted to try the vegan french dip, because let's face it, one of the things I miss about my meat-eating days is a thick roast beef sammich dipped in salty brown lava. YES!

I soooo want to rub it all over my face, then pour the au jus down my pants.

This portobello version of a french dip was actually better than any imitation I had ever tried before. All too often, vegan restaurants cover their fare with earth balance and olive oil to try and make you forget you're eating vegetables. This was filling, delicious, and not the least bit greasy. The greens on the side were good too. Don't ask me what the dressing was.... I didn't care, really. I just shoveled it into the lowest hole in my face along with everything else.


Miss Holly had the pizza.....the name started with an "m" but for the life of me, I can't remember what she said it was, as I was chewing loudly. It looked amazing, and she finished the whole thing, so I'm sure it was just as tasty as it looked.

"Pizza" is Italian for, "Eat me, or you'll be swimmin' with the fishes."


Heidi's feast looked amazing as well- the portobello wellington, which in her opinion, is the best thing she's ever had here. It comes with some veggies and a scoop of mashed taters.

Makes you just want to mash your face into it and make squishing noises.



So, if you're ever in the Madison Park area, stop on by and support this place. You'll be glad you did.

Sunday, September 25, 2011

whole-wheat spaghetti with pan-seared tofu and squash


This was one of those, "Pat left some cooked spaghetti noodles in the fridge, lets throw some leftovers at it and see what we get" kind of dinners. It was amazingly easy to put together. I could have spent my time and made it fancy, (say, by sprinkling some vegan parmasan on top, or something equally wild and crazy). But alas, I was too busy wasting away a perfectly good day off by reading blogs, clipping my toenails, and taking a stab at world domination.

The recipe serves one lonely vegan:

Half a block of Azumaya Lite extra firm tofu (or extra firm tofu of your choice)
A cup and a half of cooked whole wheat spaghetti noodles
1 half of a small cucumber squash
1 cup of a vegan Prego sauce (anything not "flavored with meat")
cooking spray
Drain tofu, squeezing any extra water out over the sink. But, don't squeeze the block too hard, you might just squeeze the life of the poor bastard. Tofu has feelings, too you know.



Slice the block in half. the half you don't use, you'll want to put in a tupperware container, filled with cold water, and store in the fridge. It should keep for 3 days or so.

Spray a medium pan with Pam, pre-heat pan on high heat.

Slice tofu into squares, rectangles, or any other parallelogram about 1/4 inch in thickness. Arrange on pre-heated pan and brown each side for 5 minutes, or until golden brown on each side.

Cut cucumber squash length-wise and scoop out the inner seeds and stringy flesh. get a glass bowl, and fill with enough tap water just to cover the bottom of the bowl,  microwave on high for 5 minutes, fleshy side down.

Now, warm  your sauce in the microwave for 1 minute 30 seconds (be sure to cover the bowl with a paper towel, or else your micro will look like a murder scene).

Warm the leftover noodles for a minute or so, assemble everything, and there's dinner.

Friday, March 4, 2011

non-crabby muffins

Oh my goodness....The crabby cheesy muffins my mom makes can now be veganized. I have actually found a delish crab substitute...substitute. Yes, I'm talking about vegan crab-goodness! I found this little gem at the Sidecar For Pig's Peace grocery store in the U district. It completely blew me away with the flavor and texture. Make these for yourself. Your tastebuds will do a happy dance.

                           
 Peer into the label of Holy goodness. Made by "All Vegetarian, Inc"


Ingredients for Ye Olde vegan crab muffins
 got these for free....All you have to do is email Tofutti and tell them how awesome they are. They will send    you a boatload of coupons!

Recipe:
One sliced english muffin (like the Orowheat"extra crispy" brand)
1/2 cup shredded vegan crab (or more....go nuts!)
1 slice Tofutti cheese


Preheat oven to 400 degrees,
assemble muffin open-faced on a cookie sheet with crab on the bottom, and 1/2 slice of the cheese on top.
Bake 15 minutes or until cheese is melted and edges are golden brown. Serve with a delicious vegan microbrew :)

              To check the vegan-ness of your favorite booze, be sure to check barnivore before you buy!

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Cedar Lake Corn Dogs



I couldn't believe my eyes when I found these at Sidecar For Pig's Peace. I was getting close to buying them online from Cosmo Vegan Shoppe, but the shipping would have cost a whopping 90 bucks. To hell with all that noise. Thankfully I bought 12 boxes of these bad boys, and I have a belly full of vegan corndog goodness. I give these beauties a 9/10. Being the only vegan corn dog in the world, they are totally awesome. My only complaint would be that the batter tends to crack a lot when nuking them in the microwave, but the same could be said about regular frozen corn dogs. 

Sexy, no?

Basil quinoa acorn squash (good) everything else (bad)

Ingredients:
acorn squash sliced in half and seeded
1/4 cup sliced mushrooms
1/4 cup diced celery
1/4 cup diced bell pepper
1/4 cup diced onion
1/4 cup quinoa, cooked
1 T basil
1 tsp black pepper
handfull almonds (optional)
1 T agave necter
2 slices tomato
2 dollops of vegan sour cream like the Tofutti brand. (I make my own)


 Someone please buy me some new plates....yeeesh!


Preheat oven to 400 degrees, place both halves of squash face down in a one inch deep baking pan. You can spray the bottom with cooking spray, but it works fine if you don't.
Bake for 45 minutes
saute mushrooms, celery, peppers, and onions for 5 minutes, or until tender. transfer to pan of cooked quinoa and mix, then add the basil, black pepper, and agave necter, mix.
Pack the mixture into each side of the squash. Top with almonds, tomato slices, and tofu sour cream.
Try not to drool and enjoy!
* behind the squash is a baked sweet potato with cinnamon and agave necter. It was good, but looked like crap*

Warning: do not make the following disasters unless you enjoy the taste of failure:


Mushrooms, quinoa, cherry tomatoes, vegan country gravy, flax seeds....looked like cat vomit. Taste wasn't too fantastic.....


Spaghetti squash spaghetti. Um, two mushy consistancies with salty Lightlife Smart Ground mixed in with prego sauce. Made for an indigestion nightmare.

Stuffed portabello mushroom caps with smart bacon, chopped bell peppers and onion, and Daiya cheese on top. Could have been delicious, but since I added too much salt, and forgot to scrape the mushroom membranes out, it tasted like a mouthful of salty dirt.


All I can say is, "At least I'm trying"....and with that said, I hope I learn other things soon before I starve.

Tofurkey can stuff it....


Yes, Whole Foods sells Tofurkey deli slices flavored just like cranberries and stuffing. All I have to say about this is, "YUM!" The flavor is amazing, and really does taste like Thanksgiving leftovers. I couldn't stop eating it. In a sandwich, on crackers, rubbed all over my face....
I wouldn't reccomend nuking it in the microwave, as it turns into some sort of vegan shoe leather in the process, and will disturb your co-workers with the ungodly smell.
Allthough the taste is amazing, the looks of the stuff are very off-putting. it's a brown/grey color with speckles, and certainly doesn't look like cranberry stuffing. So if looks matter to you that much, you can just hide it in a sandwich with cranberry spread, and you won't know the difference.

Friday, December 10, 2010

Seitanic polenta and beany string beans

Servings: 2
What you'll need:
1) Handfull of string beans (I just used the fresh ones from Costco)
2) A few asparagus spears
3) 1/2 package of seitan cubes or Yves meatballs
4) 1 tablespoon minced garlic
5) 1 and a half cups Prego (pick your flavor)
6) 1/2 can of beans, drained and rinsed (I used garbonzo beans)
7) Half a tube of polenta

Directions: put asparagus and string beans in a steamer, set it on 15 minutes. Meanwhile, cook Prego sauce according to package directions, stirring in crumbled polenta, garlic, beans, and seitan as it heats up. When the steamer dings, your sauce should also be ready.
Plate the asparagus and string beans first (I was a little backwards in the pic) and presto! You have your noms.